Jesus Appears to Thomas

Hope restored 

24 Now Thomas (also known as Didymus[a]), one of the Twelve, was not with the disciples when Jesus came. 25 So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord!” But he said to them, “Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe.”

26 Eight days later his disciples were in the house again, and Thomas was with them. Though the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you!” 27 Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.”

28 Thomas said to him, “My Lord and my God!”

29 Then Jesus told him, “You believe because you have seen me, blessed are those who have not seen and yet believe.”

Take a moment to become aware of God's presence.

Read the passage slowly. Notice what word or phrase captures your attention.

Now allow yourself to enter the scene... Thomas (also known as Didymus[a]), one of the Twelve, was not with the disciples when Jesus came. So, the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord!” But he said to them, “Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe.”

Allow the Holy Spirit to place you in St. Thomas's place. Hear the other disciples tell you, "We have seen the Lord. He's alive."

You want to believe them. More than anything, you want their words to be true. But hope has become too costly.

You watched Him die. Your heart cannot bear to be broken a second time. After Jesus' death, your world has been shattered.

Every hope, every dream suddenly seems gone. You cannot bring yourself to hope because your grief feels overwhelming. Perhaps you are protecting your heart. It is such a human response. Grief can make hope feel dangerous.

Allow the Holy Spirit to show you whether there are places in your own life where disappointment and other issues have made it difficult to hope again.

Eight days later his disciples were in the house again, and Thomas was with them. 

Though the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you!” Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.” 

Thomas said to him, “My Lord and my God!”

Then Jesus told him, “Blessed are you, because you have seen me; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” 

Eight days later you are in the room with the others.

It’s been a difficult week. Constantly questioning yourself. Is it true? But I saw him die. I saw him buried. He can’t be alive.

As you’ve pondered what you were told by the others, you realised when they spoke to you, they spoke with their joy and hope restored. 

Suddenly, Jesus stands among you. He says, “Peace be with you.” There is no judgement, only love in his eyes. He looks directly at you. His gaze pierces your heart—not with judgement, but with love. He sees your grief. He sees your confusion. He sees the places where hope has become difficult.

Then He turns towards you. “Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.”

Allow Jesus to speak into the doubts, fears, disappointments, and questions that surfaced within you as you entered Thomas's experience

Jesus does not ask you to ignore your wounds. Instead, He invites you to bring them into contact with His own wounded and risen body. The very wounds that seemed to speak of defeat have become signs of His victory and His enduring love.

Remain with Jesus.

• Look into His eyes.
• Listen more than you speak.
• What is He saying to you today?
• How do you want to respond?
• Stay there for a while before moving on. If you feel led to, journal this experience.

Being merciful to ourselves

There is something interesting in this part of the parable.

The Father sees the son while he is still a long way off. He runs to him, embraces him and welcomes him home.

And then suddenly, they are back at the house and the celebration has begun.

Jesus doesn’t tell us what happened on the journey between the road and the house.

Perhaps there is something for us to contemplate in that silence.

11 Jesus continued: “There was a man who had two sons. 12 The younger one said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate.’ So he divided his property between them.

13 “Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. 14 After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. 15 So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. 16 He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything.

17 “When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! 18 I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. 19 I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants.’ 20 So he got up and went to his father.

“But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.

21 “The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’

22 “But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. 23 Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. 24 For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate.

In this reflection, the Father is God the Father, and the “child” is me.

I am coming to understand that God’s forgiveness comes first. But I need to learn to receive and participate in that forgiveness, rather than continuing to condemn myself.

If I can’t forgive myself, how will I be able to truly forgive others who have wronged me

Jesus continued: “There was a man who had two sons. The younger one said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate.’ So he divided his property between them.

 “Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need.  So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs.  He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything.

Allow the holy spirit to take you here. While it is not stated why the younger son made this choice. We can ask the Holy Spirit  to enlighten us when we have told God I want to do this my way. 

I said to my father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate’.

Sit with this, 

allow the Spirit to highlight any motives hidden or otherwise, where I have said this to my heavenly Father.  

“When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants.’ So he got up and went to his father.

“But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.  “The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’

THE ROAD HOME 

As you journey the road home with God the Father by your side, allow yourself to have that conversation with him. 

There is no fear here only Gods holy presence. 

Allow his merciful love for you to talk to those places.

The Father has already welcomed the son. The forgiveness has already been given. The son has been received.

But perhaps the son still has to learn to believe that he really is forgiven.

Allow the Holy Spirit to take you into that journey.

Imagine yourself walking beside your Heavenly Father.

You have returned to Him. He has welcomed you. He has embraced you.

But what is happening inside you as you walk home with Him?

Are you still trying to explain yourself?

Are you still saying, “Father, I don’t deserve this”?

Are you still looking back at what you have done?

Are you waiting for the Father to change His mind?

Or can you begin to walk with Him, trusting that the forgiveness He has given you is real?

Perhaps this is part of the journey of learning to forgive ourselves.

God may have forgiven us, but sometimes we have not yet learned to live as forgiven people.

The Father does not appear to turn around on the road and say, “Now that I’ve forgiven you, let me remind you of everything you did.”

He walks with His child looking towards home.

Perhaps today Jesus is inviting me to do the same.

To stop walking or looking backwards into my past and begin walking forwards with Him.

Father, help me to believe what You have already told me.

Help me to receive Your mercy.

Help me to forgive myself, not because what I did did not matter, but because Your mercy is greater than my sin.

Teach me to come home and love and forgive myself as you do.

“But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate.

The Father says, “Quick! Bring the best robe…”

What is it like to have the Father place the robe around me?

Can I allow myself to receive it?

Do I still feel that I should be wearing the clothes of the person who left?

Can I accept the ring? The sandals?

Can I believe that the Father has restored me, rather than merely tolerated me?

The celebration — allowing ourselves to live as the beloved child who has been restored.

If you feel led to, journal this experience.

Bearing fruit — the lesson from the Fig tree  

Jesus Curses the Fig Tree

12 The next day, as they were coming back from Bethany, Jesus was hungry. 13 He saw in the distance a fig tree covered with leaves, so he went to see if he could find any figs on it. But when he came to it, he found only leaves, because it was not the right time for figs. 14 Jesus said to the fig tree, “No one shall ever eat figs from you again!”

And his disciples heard him.

Jesus Goes to the Temple

15 When they arrived in Jerusalem, Jesus went to the Temple and began to drive out all those who were buying and selling. He overturned the tables of the moneychangers and the stools of those who sold pigeons, 16 and he would not let anyone carry anything through the Temple courtyards. 17 He then taught the people: “It is written in the Scriptures that God said, ‘My Temple will be called a house of prayer for the people of all nations.’ But you have turned it into a hideout for thieves!”

18 The chief priests and the teachers of the Law heard of this, so they began looking for some way to kill Jesus. They were afraid of him, because the whole crowd was amazed at his teaching.

19 When evening came, Jesus and his disciples left the city.

The Lesson from the Fig Tree

20 Early next morning, as they walked along the road, they saw the fig tree. It was dead all the way down to its roots. 21 Peter remembered what had happened and said to Jesus, “Look, Teacher, the fig tree you cursed has died!”

22 Jesus answered them, “Have faith in God. 23 I assure you that whoever tells this hill to get up and throw itself in the sea and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him. 24 For this reason I tell you: When you pray and ask for something, believe that you have received it, and you will be given whatever you ask for. 25 And when you stand and pray, forgive anything you may have against anyone, so that your Father in heaven will forgive the wrongs you have done.”

For this reflection I wish to explore the lack of fruit the fig tree has and potential implication in one’s own spiritual life.  

It can be easy to walk with Jesus and think we have it all together. 

12 The next day, as they were coming back from Bethany, Jesus was hungry. 13 He saw in the distance a fig tree covered with leaves, so he went to see if he could find any figs on it. But when he came to it, he found only leaves, because it was not the right time for figs. 14 Jesus said to the fig tree, “No one shall ever eat figs from you again!”

What does my spiritual life look like from a distance, and what does Jesus actually find when He comes close?

Jesus Goes to the Temple

15 When they arrived in Jerusalem, Jesus went to the Temple and began to drive out all those who were buying and selling. He overturned the tables of the moneychangers and the stools of those who sold pigeons, 16 and he would not let anyone carry anything through the Temple courtyards. 17 He then taught the people: “It is written in the Scriptures that God said, ‘My Temple will be called a house of prayer for the people of all nations.’ But you have turned it into a hideout for thieves!”

The lesson from the cleansing of the temple, we can become distracted with what is going on around and within us, and miss the relationship with Jesus as we journey on with everything going on around us. 

The Temple was still functioning. There was activity, commerce, religious practice and people coming and going. But something had gone wrong at its centre. It was no longer fulfilling its proper purpose as a house of prayer. It had become a place of commerce and trade. 

1. Am I allowing what is going on inside me to distract me from my prayer?
2. Am I allowing what is going on outside and around me to distract me from prayer?

Early next morning, as they walked along the road, they saw the fig tree. It was dead all the way down to its roots. Peter remembered what had happened and said to Jesus, “Look, Teacher, the fig tree you cursed has died!”

Jesus answered them, “Have faith in God. I assure you that whoever tells this hill to get up and throw itself in the sea and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him. For this reason I tell you: When you pray and ask for something, believe that you have received it, and you will be given whatever you ask for. And when you stand and pray, forgive anything you may have against anyone, so that your Father in heaven will forgive the wrongs you have done.”

3. Do I believe in God’s promises for me?
4. Have I accepted God’s promises for me?
5. Am I willing to forgive others and myself as Jesus does and has done?

Sit with the Holy Spirit here. 

• What is he saying, addressing to me? 
• Are there areas of my life that are not bearing fruit? 
• Why are they not?
• Where am I becoming distracted?
• What is happening within the temple of my heart?
• Do I truly trust God’s promises for me?
• Is there someone I need to forgive?
• Is there something I need to allow God to forgive within me?

If you feel led journal this experience.

As I have gone on my journey with Jesus, one thing I have learned is treasures can be ungodly. For this reflection, I mean what takes God’s place in my heart. For example money, possessions and false beliefs I have about myself or those around me. E.g I am unworthy of God’s love. 

These can become idols in our hearts in place of God’s loving truth and presence.   

God and Possessions

Don’t collect for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal. But collect for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves don’t break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

The Christian life isn’t merely about getting rid of our ungodly treasures; it’s about discovering the true treasure. God’s love, mercy, truth, and presence become the treasure against which everything else is measured.

As we hear this scripture passage read out, allow the Holy Spirit to show us the treasures of our heart. 

Don’t collect for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal. But collect for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves don’t break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

• What do I possess?
• What has possession of my heart?
• Are there any false beliefs being highlighted?
• Do I believe that God loves me?
• What treasures do I actually possess?
• What is God showing me?

Spend time here with Jesus. Allow yourself to hear what he wants to tell you. 

If you feel led, journal this experience.

“Your Father knows what you need before you ask him.”
— Matthew 6:8

I found myself on a ship.

The ship was unmoored and unsecured. Its sails were still out, and the person who had been sailing it had gone somewhere without properly securing the ship or trimming the sails.

When God placed me on the ship, the wind came up and caught the sails. As a result, the ship was heading towards a rocky ledge, potentially causing serious damage or even sinking the ship.

And God was using me to rectify the situation.

Somehow, I knew what needed to be done: trim the sails, deploy the anchor, and secure the ship.

Nothing more. Nothing less.

As I pondered this, I was shown that God knew what would happen. He had used me to bless this person. God was acting through me to safeguard both the person and what belonged to them—in this case, their ship.

That is all I know.

I was given no other information or details. I only knew that this ship was not secured when it should have been.

This was God looking after one of His people.

I am not even sure whether this person realised that they had created a potential problem for themselves, or that God had intervened to prevent that potentially serious situation from occurring.

As you hear this read a second time, allow the Holy Spirit to show you what God wants to give you. 

Your Father knows what you need before you ask him.

How often does God do something similar in our lives without us knowing?

Sometimes we are the person God uses.

Sometimes we are the person being helped.

Sometimes we may never know which one we were.

Sometimes we may not even be aware that something like this has ever happened.

Matthew 6:8 reminds me that God knows what we need before we ask Him. His knowledge comes before our awareness. His care does not depend upon us seeing it.

I don’t have to understand everything God is doing.

I don’t have to see the whole situation.

I don’t even have to know that He is working.

I can trust that He knows.

Perhaps there are things God has already done for me that I will never discover. Perhaps there have been people He has placed in my path for reasons I never understood. Perhaps there have been dangers I never knew I was near because He had already taken care of them.

How do I feel knowing that God does things like this?

How do I feel knowing that God may ask me to do something like this for Him?

How do I feel knowing that He may use me to bless someone else?

And how do I feel knowing that God may have done something like this for me in my past?

The ship reminded me that God’s providence can be hidden from us while being completely present.

When we are not looking, God is.

As I have walked my transgendered journey with Jesus, one thing I have learned is, There are two sorts of people before God: those who tell God how to run the universe, and those who ask Him, ‘What do You want me to do?’

Another question that comes up is, ‘What did I do wrong to deserve this?’

The question we need to be able to ask of God is, What do you want me to do with this? And of ourselves what do I want to do with this?

I don’t necessarily get to choose what happens to me, but I do have a choice about what I do with what happens to me.

The other question I have is what is stopping some from accepting this teaching including the piece on people not being able to marry.

Jesus Teaches about Divorce

19 When Jesus finished saying these things, he left Galilee and went to the territory of Judea on the other side of the Jordan River. 2 Large crowds followed him, and he healed them there.
3 Some Pharisees came to him and tried to trap him by asking, “Does our Law allow a man to divorce his wife for whatever reason he wishes?”

4 Jesus answered, “Haven't you read the scripture that says that in the beginning the Creator made people male and female? 5 And God said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and unite with his wife, and the two will become one.’ 6 So they are no longer two, but one. No human being must separate, then, what God has joined together.”

7 The Pharisees asked him, “Why, then, did Moses give the law for a man to hand his wife a divorce notice and send her away?”

8 Jesus answered, “Moses gave you permission to divorce your wives because you are so hard to teach. But it was not like that at the time of creation. 9 I tell you, then, that any man who divorces his wife for any cause other than her unfaithfulness, commits adultery if he marries some other woman.”

10 His disciples said to him, “If this is how it is between a man and his wife, it is better not to marry.”

11 Jesus answered, “This teaching does not apply to everyone, but only to those to whom God has given it. 12 For there are different reasons why men cannot marry: some, because they were born that way; others, because men made them that way; and others do not marry for the sake of the Kingdom of heaven. Let him who can accept this teaching do so.”

1 Samuel 16:7

7 But the Lord said to him, “Pay no attention to how tall and handsome he is. I have rejected him, because I do not judge as people judge. They look at the outward appearance, but I look at the heart.”

ISA 55:8-9

8 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. 9 “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.

Jesus answered, “This teaching does not apply to everyone, but only to those to whom God has given it. For there are different reasons why men cannot marry: some, because they were born that way; others, because men made them that way; and others do not marry for the sake of the Kingdom of heaven. Let him who can accept this teaching do so.

Jesus’ answer here is directed at why divorce was allowed. He then addressess about eunuchs and those who cannot marry.

Can I trust God when I don’t understand what He has permitted in my life - or in another person’s life?

Lord, I don’t understand this. I may not even like it. But what do You want me to do with it?

Do I have a problem accepting or understanding this teaching?

1Samuel 16:7

 But the Lord said to him, “Pay no attention to how tall and handsome he is. I have rejected him, because I do not judge as people judge. They look at the outward appearance, but I look at the heart.”

Do I realise when God sees and looks at me, he sees and knows all of me, nothing is hidden from him?

Do I believe this?

How does this make me feel?

Sit with Jesus here. Tell him what you’re feeling. Allow him to respond. Allow yourself to hear and receive his response.

Notice how he speaks to you.

ISA 55:8-9

8

 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts,

neither are your ways my ways,”

declares the Lord.

 9 

“As the heavens are higher than the earth,

so are my ways higher than your ways

and my thoughts than your thoughts.

What do I feel about what God has shown and told me?

Do I believe God loves me and others as we are now?

Do I believe God has a plan for my life as I am now?

Do I believe God has a plan for ‘that person’ as they are now?

Allow Jesus to minister to me and my wounds here.

If you feel led, journal this experience.

23/8/26

The woman at the well 

The woman here comes to the well in the hottest part of the day. Traditionally this has been understood as a sign that she was isolated from her community, effectively an outcast.

4 Now he had to go through Samaria. 5 So he came to a town in Samaria called Sychar, near the plot of ground Jacob had given to his son Joseph. 6 Jacob’s well was there, and Jesus, tired as he was from the journey, sat down by the well. It was about noon.

7 When a Samaritan woman came to draw water, Jesus said to her, “Will you give me a drink?”8 (His disciples had gone into the town to buy food.)

9 The Samaritan woman said to him, “You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?” (For Jews do not associate with Samaritans.[a])

10 Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.”

11 “Sir,” the woman said, “you have nothing to draw with and the well is deep. Where can you get this living water? 12 Are you greater than our father Jacob, who gave us the well and drank from it himself, as did also his sons and his livestock?”

13 Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, 14 but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”

15 The woman said to him, “Sir, give me this water so that I won’t get thirsty and have to keep coming here to draw water.”

16 He told her, “Go, call your husband and come back.”

17 “I have no husband,” she replied.

Jesus said to her, “You are right when you say you have no husband. 18 The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true.”

19 “Sir,” the woman said, “I can see that you are a prophet. 20 Our ancestors worshiped on this mountain, but you Jews claim that the place where we must worship is in Jerusalem.”

21 “Woman,” Jesus replied, “believe me, a time is coming when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem. 22 You Samaritans worship what you do not know; we worship what we do know, for salvation is from the Jews. 23 Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in the Spirit and in truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. 24 God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in the Spirit and in truth.”

25 The woman said, “I know that Messiah” (called Christ) “is coming. When he comes, he will explain everything to us.”

26 Then Jesus declared, “I, the one speaking to you—I am he.”

The Disciples Rejoin Jesus

27 Just then his disciples returned and were surprised to find him talking with a woman. But no one asked, “What do you want?” or “Why are you talking with her?”

28 Then, leaving her water jar, the woman went back to the town and said to the people,29 “Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Messiah?” 30 They came out of the town and made their way toward him.

31 Meanwhile his disciples urged him, “Rabbi, eat something.”

32 But he said to them, “I have food to eat that you know nothing about.”

33 Then his disciples said to each other, “Could someone have brought him food?”

34 “My food,” said Jesus, “is to do the will of him who sent me and to finish his work. 35 Don’t you have a saying, ‘It’s still four months until harvest’? I tell you, open your eyes and look at the fields! They are ripe for harvest. 36 Even now the one who reaps draws a wage and harvests a crop for eternal life, so that the sower and the reaper may be glad together. 37 Thus the saying ‘One sows and another reaps’ is true. 38 I sent you to reap what you have not worked for. Others have done the hard work, and you have reaped the benefits of their labor.”

Many Samaritans Believe

39 Many of the Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman’s testimony, “He told me everything I ever did.” 40 So when the Samaritans came to him, they urged him to stay with them, and he stayed two days. 41 And because of his words many more became believers.

42 They said to the woman, “We no longer believe just because of what you said; now we have heard for ourselves, and we know that this man really is the Savior of the world.”

Be the woman at the well. 

What if the place where I most feel like an outcast is actually the place where Jesus is waiting for me?

Now he had to go through Samaria. So he came to a town in Samaria called Sychar, near the plot of ground Jacob had given to his son Joseph. Jacob’s well was there, and Jesus, tired as he was from the journey, sat down by the well. It was about noon.

When a Samaritan woman came to draw water, Jesus said to her, “Will you give me a drink?” (His disciples had gone into the town to buy food.)

The Samaritan woman said to him, “You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?” (For Jews do not associate with Samaritans.[a])

Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.”

“Sir,” the woman said, “you have nothing to draw with and the well is deep. Where can you get this living water? Are you greater than our father Jacob, who gave us the well and drank from it himself, as did also his sons and his livestock?”

Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”

The woman said to him, “Sir, give me this water so that I won’t get thirsty and have to keep coming here to draw water.”

He told her, “Go, call your husband and come back.”

“I have no husband,” she replied.

Jesus said to her, “You are right when you say you have no husband. The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true.”

Where do you see yourself outside God’s presence?

What is Jesus saying to me here?

You do not have to come to me when you have everything sorted out. Come to me as you are. I already know your thirst, your wounds, and the places where you feel excluded. I am not waiting at the well to expose you; I am waiting to give you living water.

“Sir,” the woman said, “I can see that you are a prophet. Our ancestors worshiped on this mountain, but you Jews claim that the place where we must worship is in Jerusalem.”

“Woman,” Jesus replied, “believe me, a time is coming when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem. You Samaritans worship what you do not know; we worship what we do know, for salvation is from the Jews. Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in the Spirit and in truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in the Spirit and in truth.”

The woman said, “I know that Messiah” (called Christ) “is coming. When he comes, he will explain everything to us.”

Then Jesus declared, “I, the one speaking to you—I am he.”

The Disciples Rejoin Jesus

Just then his disciples returned and were surprised to find him talking with a woman. But no one asked, “What do you want?” or “Why are you talking with her?”

Then, leaving her water jar, the woman went back to the town and said to the people, “Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Messiah?”

Jesus knows everything she has ever done, yet he does not turn away from her. He brings her truth into the light, not to shame her, but to lead her into freedom and deeper relationship with him.

Jesus doesn’t reveal the woman’s past and then withdraw. He reveals it and stays.

As you sit with Jesus, what does he reveal?

Why are you feeling this way as it is revealed?

What emotions you can feel?  Fear, shame… anything else?

How does Jesus actually respond? 

Hear the love and care in his voice and response.

Sit with Jesus here, listen to what he has to say. 

If you feel led, journal this experience.  

30/8/26

For me as I have been polishing up my article about my vocation, I realised at one point I was this sheep. However, 1) I did not know I was lost. And 2) Also, I felt I deserved to be lost.

3 So Jesus told them this parable:

4 “Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them—what do you do? You leave the other ninety-nine sheep in the pasture and go looking for the one that got lost until you find it. 5 When you find it, you are so happy that you put it on your shoulders 6 and carry it back home. Then you call your friends and neighbors together and say to them, ‘I am so happy I found my lost sheep. Let us celebrate!’ 7 In the same way, I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine respectable people who do not need to repent.

Sit quietly here. 

Jesus is the good shepherd, I am the lost sheep he is looking for. 

As you hear this parable read, invite the Holy Spirit in. 

Allow him to show you any false beliefs, ideas that maybe present,

 “Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them—what do you do? You leave the other ninety-nine sheep in the pasture and go looking for the one that got lost until you find it. When you find it, you are so happy that you put it on your shoulders and carry it back home. Then you call your friends and neighbors together and say to them, ‘I am so happy I found my lost sheep. Let us celebrate!’ In the same way, I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine respectable people who do not need to repent.

• Do I realise I might be lost?
• Do I believe I deserve to be lost?
• What emotions am I feeling? - Shame, Fear, others. Allow yourself to feel them.
• Do I realise Jesus is actively looking for me, that he both loves me and wants to find me?
• Do I want him to find me?
• When he finds me how do I feel when he places me on his shoulders and carries me back?
• How do I feel, when everyone celebrates Jesus arriving home with me on his shoulders
• Do I resist him?
• Do I feel worthy of being carried?
• Do I believe I should walk home by myself?
• What happens when Jesus tells me I don’t have to?

Allow Jesus to minister to you here. Hear what he wants to tell you.

Notice the love and care he is talking to you with.

Bring your emotions and what you're feeling to him  

If you feel led, journal this experience

One issue I have struggled with is being able to forgive and release myself when Jesus through his cross has cancelled the actual debt I owe him. 

If I cannot or willnot forgive or release myself as Jesus has done, how can I receive his forgiveness?

Invite the Holy Spirit to come in now.

Listen with your heart as you hear this parable read. 

Picture the servant before his master. 

You are the servant Jesus is the master.  

The Parable of the Unmerciful Servant

21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”

22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.[g]

23 “Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. 24 As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand bags of gold[h] was brought to him. 25 Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt.

26 “At this the servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ 27 The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go.

28 “But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred silver coins.[i] He grabbed him and began to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded.

29 “His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay it back.’

30 “But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. 31 When the other servants saw what had happened, they were outraged and went and told their master everything that had happened.

32 “Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. 33 Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ 34 In anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.

35 “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”

To start this reflection I want to enter into the conversation between the master and this servant. 

The master has heard from other servants what happened. He calls the servant in to find out what has actually happened and to confront the servant. 

The master is grieved, I showed him mercy. Why didn't he show the same mercy to his fellow servant?

The master then asks his servant:

I cancelled your debt. Why didn’t you show mercy?

Why haven’t you received my forgiveness?

Are there areas of my life where I haven’t forgiven or released myself as Jesus has done?

Hear the scripture as it is read again. 

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”

Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.[g]

“Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand bags of gold[h] was brought to him. Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt.

“At this the servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’  The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go.

“But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred silver coins.[i] He grabbed him and began to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded.

“His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay it back.’

“But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were outraged and went and told their master everything that had happened.

“Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’  In anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.

“This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”

Allow the words of the Scripture to speak to you.

Notice the hands in the story. In the parable, your hands are around your own neck, demanding payment. Now, look up at the Cross. Look at His hands, open and stretched wide, bearing the exact mark of the debt you are trying to pay.

Listen with your heart.

Notice what catches your attention.

Notice where you are drawn.

Notice what the Holy Spirit may be revealing to you.

What debt did I bring to the Cross today that I’ve been trying to pay myself?

What changes in me when I hear Jesus say 'Father, forgive them' over this specific mistake?

At the Cross

Allow the Holy Spirit to show you Jesus on the Cross.

Hear His words:

“Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”

Allow the Holy Spirit to show you Jesus saying these words.

Hear Him as He speaks them.

Hear Him speak them to you.

Receive His forgiveness.

Release the issue or issues to Him now.

You do not have to continue carrying what Jesus has already carried for you.

Stay here with Jesus.

Listen to His loving care.

Listen to His forgiveness.

Listen to His mercy for you.

Allow yourself to receive what He is offering you.

If you feel led, journal this experience.

22/9/26

For this reflection, I want to explore how some of the workers who had worked all day, after being paid, felt that they were treated unjustly, while others had worked only for an hour or three hours received the same reward. 

In prayer I was shown, that there were some who took their frustration and anger out on those who worked less than they did. 

For this reflection God the Father is the land owner. 

The vineyard the world. We are the workers.

The reward is eternal life. 

Come into the presence of the Holy Spirit and Jesus. Invite him into your heart.

As you hear again the words of the parable, particularly the reaction of those who had worked all day, allow the Holy Spirit to show you…

Have I perceived something that has happened to me or around me as unjust?

The Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard

20 “For the kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire workers for his vineyard. 2 He agreed to pay them a denarius[a] for the day and sent them into his vineyard.

3 “About nine in the morning he went out and saw others standing in the marketplace doing nothing. 4 He told them, ‘You also go and work in my vineyard, and I will pay you whatever is right.’ 5 So they went.

“He went out again about noon and about three in the afternoon and did the same thing. 6 About five in the afternoon he went out and found still others standing around. He asked them, ‘Why have you been standing here all day long doing nothing?’

7 “‘Because no one has hired us,’ they answered.

“He said to them, ‘You also go and work in my vineyard.’

8 “When evening came, the owner of the vineyard said to his foreman, ‘Call the workers and pay them their wages, beginning with the last ones hired and going on to the first.’

9 “The workers who were hired about five in the afternoon came and each received a denarius.10 So when those came who were hired first, they expected to receive more. But each one of them also received a denarius. 11 When they received it, they began to grumble against the landowner. 12 ‘These who were hired last worked only one hour,’ they said, ‘and you have made them equal to us who have borne the burden of the work and the heat of the day.’

¹³ “But he answered one of them, ‘I am not being unfair to you, friend. Didn’t you agree to work for a denarius? ¹⁴ Take your pay and go. I want to give the one who was hired last the same as I gave you. ¹⁵ Don’t I have the right to do what I want with my own money? Or are you envious because I am generous?’

16 “So the last will be first, and the first will be last.”

As you hear the parable read out, allow the Spirit to show you where you have experienced an injustice. 

Allow Jesus to show you your emotions here.

What are your feeling here? Anger, rage, unfairness at what happened?

Have any questions come up? Sit with them. 

This is what you bring to Jesus. 

As you hear the parable read a second time, allow the Holy Spirit to show you where you are in this parable.  

“For the kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire workers for his vineyard. He agreed to pay them a denarius[a] for the day and sent them into his vineyard.

“About nine in the morning he went out and saw others standing in the marketplace doing nothing. He told them, ‘You also go and work in my vineyard, and I will pay you whatever is right.’ So they went.

“He went out again about noon and about three in the afternoon and did the same thing. About five in the afternoon he went out and found still others standing around. He asked them, ‘Why have you been standing here all day long doing nothing?’

“‘Because no one has hired us,’ they answered.

“He said to them, ‘You also go and work in my vineyard.’

“When evening came, the owner of the vineyard said to his foreman, ‘Call the workers and pay them their wages, beginning with the last ones hired and going on to the first.’

“The workers who were hired about five in the afternoon came and each received a denarius.So when those came who were hired first, they expected to receive more. But each one of them also received a denarius. 1When they received it, they began to grumble against the landowner. ‘These who were hired last worked only one hour,’ they said, ‘and you have made them equal to us who have borne the burden of the work and the heat of the day.’

“But he answered one of them, ‘I am not being unfair to you, friend. Didn’t you agree to work for a denarius? Take your pay and go. I want to give the one who was hired last the same as I gave you. Don’t I have the right to do what I want with my own money? Or are you envious because I am generous?’

“So the last will be first, and the first will be last.”

What do you want to say or do to the other party?

Feel these emotions. Don’t push them away. Allow yourself to acknowledge what is really there.

As you sit here with this, allow the Holy Spirit to take you to the foot of the cross.

Look upon Jesus crucified. Bloodied, suffering, dying. 

Just before he dies hear him say, ‘Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.’  Hear him say this directly to you. 

Receive His complete forgiveness and understanding.

Bring your hard questions to Him—knowing He listens with total patience, without scolding or turning away.

As you feel His unmerited grace, ask yourself: Can I offer this same forgiveness to those who have wronged me, releasing them into His hands?

Sit with Jesus now. Have that conversation with him now.

If you feel led, journal this experience.

29/9/26

For this reflection I want to explore the topic of ignorance. 

As a transgendered person, this is something I and others regularly run into and have to deal with. 

There are elements of everyone’s lives, including our own, that we cannot see. However, God sees everything. Where human vision stops, God’s complete understanding begins.

He can also deal with these issues.

One trick the enemy uses is we need to come to God without our issues. One of the more common feelings we can get is a strong sense of being ashamed. The goal here is to try and get us to hide, not confess or own our issues before God. 

We don’t need to get our issues, pain and lives in order before we come to Jesus. We come to Jesus as we are. Jesus wants us to come to him as we are. 

As the verses are read, invite Jesus into my heart and to show me what he wants to show me. 

Matthew 19:12 — Jesus and the eunuchs

“For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others—and there are those who choose to live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who is able to accept this should accept it.”

1 Samuel 16:6–7 — Samuel and Eliab

“When they arrived, he looked at Eliab and thought, ‘Surely the Lord’s anointed stands here before the Lord.’ But the Lord said to Samuel, ‘Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.’”

First Reading — What is being stirred?

What emotions, feelings beliefs have been touched as I hear this read?

Have any emotions, feelings come up?

Have any attitudes been revealed. 

Sit with these, this is what we will bring to to Jesus. 

As we hear the readings read a second time allow the Holy Spirit to show you any issues, belief attitudes and emotions I may have. Also where I might be in these readings. 

Matthew 19:12 — Jesus and the eunuchs

“For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others—and there are those who choose to live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who is able to accept this should accept it.”

1 Samuel 16:6–7 — Samuel and Eliab

“When they arrived, he looked at Eliab and thought, ‘Surely the Lord’s anointed stands here before the Lord.’ But the Lord said to Samuel, ‘Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.’”

Resting with Jesus

How do I feel knowing there is nothing that I can hide from Jesus?

He knows me and he knows my heart. 

Am I willing to invite him into this?

Sit with Jesus here. Have that conversation with him. 

Can I hand these over to Him now?

Stay with Jesus a while. Allow Him to minister to you while you are with him.

If you feel led, journal this experience.  

3/10/26

For this reflection I want to explore being childlike before God. The difference is not being like a child, but childlike.

For me it is the difference between being humble before God, even when I am an adult. 

Children need to learn and grow in understanding the things they need to learn. As adults, we have learned many of these things through our lives. Therefore, being childlike before God is not about becoming like a child again, but about bringing what we have learned as adults before God with humility and trust.

This is where we must realise that God is infinite; He has no beginning and no end. I, on the other hand, am a finite, sinful human being. 

Below are working definitions of these understandings.

Humility: God is God, and I am not. I am finite; He is infinite.

Trust: Because God is my Father, I can place myself in His hands, even when I don’t understand.

Self-Reliance: The illusion of total control. Believing I must provide, protect, and figure out everything on my own.

With this foundation in mind, let us turn to Scripture. 

As we prepare to hear this reading ask the Holy Spirit to come into your heart now.

Allow Him to show you where self-reliance might be an issue in your journey with Jesus. 

Matthew 18:1-4

18 At that time the disciples came to Jesus, asking, “Who is the greatest in the Kingdom of heaven?”

2 So Jesus called a child to come and stand in front of them, 3 and said, “I assure you that unless you change and become like children, you will never enter the Kingdom of heaven. 4 The greatest in the Kingdom of heaven is the one who humbles himself and becomes like this child

Matthew 19:14

14 Jesus said, “Let the children come to me and do not stop them, because the Kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”

Allow the Holy Spirit to show you what He wants to show you. 

What emotions am I feeling? Fear, anger, a desire for control, 

What has come up? Issues, memories,   

This is what we bring to Jesus. 

Where am I finding it difficult to place something into God’s hands?

Where do I feel I have to understand everything before I can trust?

Where might I be trying to control something that I need to surrender to God?

Where am I allowing myself to be self-reliant?

What might God be asking me to receive from Him rather than trying to provide for myself?

What would childlike trust look like in this particular part of my life?

As we hear the reading a second time allow the Holy Spirit to show you what He wants to show you about trusting Him. 

At that time the disciples came to Jesus, asking, “Who is the greatest in the Kingdom of heaven?”

So Jesus called a child to come and stand in front of them, and said, “I assure you that unless you change and become like children, you will never enter the Kingdom of heaven. The greatest in the Kingdom of heaven is the one who humbles himself and becomes like this child

Jesus said, “Let the children come to me and do not stop them, because the Kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”

Bring these beliefs, issues and emotions to Him. Hear what Jesus has to say to you. 

Receive His truth, love and understanding now. 

Am I able to choose to trust and humble myself before Him?

Sit with Him and have that conversation with Him now. 

If you feel led, journal this experience